Song Lyrics Christine Lavin - Artificial Means    [Lyrics & Song Text Archive] lyrics archive>> C>> Christine Lavin Singer Lyrics [Christine Lavin other resources]>> Artificial Means Song Lyrics Author/Artist/Singer: Christine Lavin Music Title/Track: Artificial Means Theme ID: 7750 Album: N/A ARTIFICIAL MEANS (Christine Lavin, Copyright Flip-A-Jig Music 1984) Johnny and Janie were the perfect married couple But not in bed Oh they tried taking drugs, How-To Books, even Dr. Ruth But for all intents and purposes, Their love life was dead. 'Till one day Janie went over to the Pink Pussycat Boutique. She bought a long cylindrical thing. Now Janie is smiling, Johnny is not. Every night you can hear him sing, He says, ''Our love is bein' kept alive by Artificial Means, You've grown emotionally attached to that little pink machine, Our relationship is not as healthy as it seems 'Cause our love is being kept alive by artificial means'' Johnny went down to the barroom He bought one drink, he bought two, he bought three. Oh, he moaned to the bartender the state of his married life. Bartender said, ''Hey Bud, just listen to me.'' So Johnny went over to the Pink Pussycat Boutique, He bought a plastic blow-up doll. Now Johnny is smiling, Janie is not. She is angry she is jealous, she's appalled. She says ''Our love is bein' kept alive by Artificial Means You've grown emotionally attached to that poly-ethylene. Our relationship is not as healthy as it seems, 'Cause our love is being kept alive by artificial means'' Bridge: Wires (wires), Switches (switches), Batteries (batteries), Plastic (plastic), Tufts of polyester hair. Who'd ever think they could replace the love (love!) Humans used to share (humans used to, humans used to, humans used to, humans used to!) Then one fateful day those batteries died At the same moment that that big doll sprung a leak (psssss). Janie looked at Johnny looked at Janie looked at Johnny, They both found it difficult to speak I wish I could say they threw those contraptions away And fell in love all over again, But Johnny taped up that hissing woman When Janie stole the batteries from his Sony Walkman. Their love is bein kept alive by Artificial Means. They've grown emotionally attached to those modern sex machines. Their relationship is not as healthy as it seems, 'Cause their love is being kept alive by artificial means @sex filename[ ARTMEANS BR ===DOCUMENT BOUNDARY Related Lyrics Random lyrics: Crazy Ridiculous, Did You Really Love Me, Do You Want My Love, Dont You Want My Love, I Will Be Your Friend, Just No Other Way (To Love Me), All Around The World, Reflection, Andamos Armados, Asi Son Mis Dias, Cheve, Comprendes Mendes?, Control Machete, El Son Divo, Grin-Gosano, Humanos Mexicanos, Justo N, La Lupita, Mexican Curios (Bonus Track), Danzon, Desde La Tierra (El Tercer Planeta), Esperanza, Grita, Ileso, Instancias (Los Vigilantes), La Artillera, Pesada, Presente, Si Senor, Ladre El Desmadre, Bandera, Bien, Bien, Como Ves, De, El Genio Del Dub, En El Camino, Nostalgia, Paciencia, Toda La Casa, A Veces Vuelvo, Acaba El Fin, El Numero Imperfecto, Magia Veneno, Plan B: Anhelo De Satisfaccion, Refugio, Apirie Omapare Piarolo, Calavera Deforme, Dale!, El Lugar, Elevador, Other Christine Lavin song Lyrics Attainable Love Lyrics Fly On A Plane Lyrics Kind Of Love You Never Recover From Lyrics Moving Target Lyrics Sensitive New Age Guys Lyrics Shopping Cart Of Love: The Play Lyrics Venus Kissed The Moon Lyrics BLind Dating Fun Lyrics Compass Lyrics High Heel Shoes Lyrics I Bring Out The Worst In You Lyrics ...Show All Other Artists LAW Lyrics Law of the Dawn Lyrics Law Unwritten Lyrics Unwritten Law Lyrics Lawnmover Deth Lyrics Lawnmower Deth Lyrics Lawrence Arms Lyrics Lawrence Arms The Lyrics Lawrence Gowan Lyrics Lawrence Gray Lyrics All lyrics are property and copyright of their owners and are strictly for educational purposes only. lyricstrue.net Copyright © 2005-2007 All Rights Reserved., , Privacy policy